Dear future boyfriend,
I will be your biggest cheerleader – encouraging and emotionally supportive. I will always let you know that you are special to me.
Once we are in a committed, monogamous relationship my sexual desire for you will increase tenfold and I hope that you will satisfy me as I will you. I will have us try new experiences together. I will be your number one protector. I will enjoy our time together and hopefully you will too. We will be happy together.
In return, I need you to know that the first several times I sleep over your place I will check the doors and windows to ensure they are closed. I will wake up several times throughout the night in a panic until I remember where I am and who you are. Don’t ask questions just tell me it’s you, that I’m safe then hold me. I will not say anything but I will love you for that.
I will check your medicine cabinet, car and closets for traces of another woman. This is because I promised myself never to be blindsided ever again. Don’t take this personally, just let me do my thing so I can get comfortable and begin to trust you.
During our first argument I will break up with you at least once, not because I don’t want you but because I would rather hurt a little now when I just like you instead of hurting a lot later when I have fallen deeply in love with you. Just reassure me that you are not going anywhere, bring me a present, let’s eat and talk about it.
Just be honest with me, if you lie about something it will come out later and then I will question everything you say.
I hope that you are strong enough to handle me, be patient with me and we will be great together.
Good luck my future boyfriend!
From your future girlfriend R.