Once you go white….

Tonight I talked to an older Caucasian gentleman in his 50s. He made me laugh and was pretty nice to talk to. There might be a date in the near future, and I’m open to it. 🙂 You know what they say, once you go white…. Personally I don’t care about race, just want someone who wants me as I am and treats me well.

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Bachelor Number 2 Vs Bachelor 3

Bachelor number 2 did not understand why I said no to his invitation to go “hang out” at his house. He had a day off and he wanted me to take the day off work and hang out with him. So I had done the meet and greet that he wanted and I was very straightforward in letting him know that dating me means actually taking me on dates that involve actual activities. Anyway, he failed and I moved on.

Along came Bachelor number 3. He was very muscular and totally sweet to me. We talked on the phone a bit and had a date set for the weekend. Before the weekend, we had the weirdest argument. He had asked if I masturbate or not and what I do. I stupidly answered, I said I masturbate mostly in the mornings and I use a vibrator on my clit and that gets me there! Whatever happened, he wanted to hear me masturbate over the phone so said that masturbating is “me time” and I don’t share it with someone else. He got mad and started saying that if I was his woman how could I be denying him sex and he would have to beg for it all the time. It got weird really quick. Then he said that I am not like all the other girls he has been with and why am I different. So I was done at that point since this was the tenth time that I had to hear how I was different from all the other girls he has been with and I told him he should go be with all those other girls. And to enjoy his jumping to conclusions by himself! Anyway, he said he was done with me and hung up. I looked at the phone, then continued washing my dishes. Yes I was washing dishes at the time and I went on with my life. I was a little sad that it ended way before it started because I know I would make an awesome girlfriend but I will not settle! And I am fine being single if Mr. Awesome boyfriend never shows up.

Several days later Bachelor number 3 sent me a text saying that he missed me. I looked at the text, shook my head and deleted it. You only get one shot with this woman so as Beyonce (one of my favorites, in the song “Sorry”) sang – “I put my dueces up!” and blocked his number; BYE bachelor number 3!

Bachelor Number One vs Bachelor Number Two

This past weekend I found myself with two meet and greets with two men with potential.

Bachelor Number One wanted to meet up Friday evening. I recently read an article that said that when women date they change their schedules and try to include their guy in what they do while men continue with their plans and add the woman into their lives. So at first I was going to skip going to the gym and go see him but then I remembered the article and asked if we could meet up after the gym. He agreed.

Bachelor Number Two wanted to meet Saturday morning. I did not have other plans so no complication there.

On Friday, after work I went to the gym and after I finished I sent a text to Bachelor Number One since I wanted him to know that I was about to go take a shower and then I would be ready to meet him. He did not respond so I called him. He answered with a tired sleepy voice. Weird. He said he fell asleep. He made no mention of  whether or not we were still on to meet. So I asked and he gave some dumb answer. I hung up the phone upset that I didn’t know that he was going to cancel sooner because then I would have attended this exercise class that I wanted to attend. Anyway, my Friday night plans were a bust. Later on, Bachelor Number One sent me a long series of texts saying how he didn’t think I cared about actually meeting up. I was going to be in my gym clothes anyway, it’s not like I was going to get really dressed up. He was going to have to drive for one hour. As I read his texts, I started getting pissed off not because he canceled but because he was listing all the reasons how it was okay because of my actions; instead of apologizing and letting me know his plan to make it up to me. In the end, I blocked him and continued with my life.

Saturday morning I woke up not expecting too much from this second meet and greet. Bachelor Number Two arrived early at our designated meeting spot. I got into his car and we went to the park. We talked and ended up taking a nice walk together. When we started walking, he immediately took my hand into his and we walked hand in hand. For a few minutes I felt self conscious because he is German/Italian and I am not. There were several African American men and I felt that they would judge me or say something about the dark-skinned woman with a white guy. After a few minutes, I said to heck with it! Why am I letting people who are not invested in making me happy dictate my happiness. And so I left that thought process alone and focused on holding hands with Bachelor Number Two as we hiked up a small hill. His kisses were great and by the time we went back to the car I knew that if he asked me on a real date; I would actually say yes! Who knows what the future will hold but I look forward to finding out!

Dating Adonis

While driving to work a few days ago I started thinking about the time I dated
a bodybuilder type guy, I’ll call him Adonis. His body was amazing! He was
pure muscle, every inch of him was hard and yes I knew that because I ran
my hands all over his body on multiple occasions! LOL……………. He looked
like he could give the men in the bodybuilding competitions a run for their
money.
I could not get over the fact that he was able to carry me so easily! I got
piggyback rides and he would carry me right back to bed like a million times
without complaint or much effort. It was wonderful to not have to worry
about if I was hurting the guy I was with because I’m much heavier than he
is. I was in heaven!!!!………………. Then came the rules and regulations to
being with Adonis. I had to be submissive to him in and out of the bedroom. I
had to get permission to do things I did on a regular basis and if he said no
than I could not do whatever it was. For example, if I wanted to go shopping
for myself with my own money, I had to ask permission and if he said
yes then I could go shopping. I tried to see if we could compromise maybe
just be submissive in bed only but according to Adonis it was not up for
negotiations and that was the only way we would be together. After taking a
day to think about the fabulous sex with him and being carried like I weighed
nothing ……………… I had to let him go. I do not regret my decision but once
in a while, I  find myself thinking about Adonis’ amazing body and I smile.
I am okay being with myself until I find the person who is just right with me.
Yes there is a really big chance that I never find that person at which point I will
continue enjoying being by myself!

To mistress or not to mistress

Earlier this week I had the opportunity to become a mistress (side chick, the other woman) to this very sexy man in his forties. When we began flirting, I did not know that he was married and after a week I asked and he said he was married. Immediately I told him I would stop flirting with him and he should set me up with one of his single friends. Conveniently, he said that he only has married friends and he asked if I would be interested in being his “friend”. Naively I thought he really meant platonic friendship but in the end I figured out he was offering me a mistress position.

I thought about it…….. and in the end I sent him a nice text saying I enjoyed meeting him and our conversation was wonderful but I’m better alone. Thank you and good bye. Then I proceeded to block his phone numbers on my phone and pray that he does not stop by my house.

Looking back, it was a compliment to be “nominated” but I’m okay. I’ll wait for a guy I can call my own but I’m not looking to marry him just want to date the hell out of him!!!! lol.

R.

 

Dear future boyfriend

Dear future boyfriend,

I will be your biggest cheerleader – encouraging and emotionally supportive. I will always let you know that you are special to me.

Once we are in a committed, monogamous relationship my sexual desire for you will increase tenfold and I hope that you will satisfy me as I will you.  I will have us try new experiences together. I will be your number one protector. I will enjoy our time together and hopefully you will too. We will be happy together.

In return, I need you to know that the first several times I sleep over your place I will check the doors and windows to ensure they are closed. I will wake up several times throughout the night in a panic until I remember  where I am and who you are. Don’t ask questions just tell me it’s you, that I’m safe then hold me. I will not say anything but I will love you for that.

I will check your medicine cabinet,  car and closets for traces of another woman. This is because  I  promised myself never to be blindsided ever again. Don’t take this personally, just let me do my thing so I can get comfortable and begin to trust you.

During our first argument I will break up with you at least once, not because I don’t want you but because I would rather hurt a little now when I just like you instead of hurting a lot later when I have fallen deeply in love with you. Just reassure me that you are not going anywhere, bring me a present, let’s eat and talk about it.

Just be honest with me, if you lie about something it will come out later and then I will question everything you say.

I hope that you are strong enough to handle me, be patient with me and we will be great together.

Good luck my future boyfriend!

From your future girlfriend R.